It is about the involuntary emission of urine after the age of 5 years, when it is normally assumed that they should have already reached the control of their sphincters.
The urinary system, in general, alerts us regarding conflicts of territory, and specifically in the function of losing, marking, ordering or organizing the territory.
Biologically, animals use urine to mark territory.
We do the same, but our notion of territory is a little broader, it can be a real or symbolic territory, such as our house, our office, our things, our country or something symbolic such as our partner, our work, our family, our projects, etc.
For enuresis to manifest, two emotional conflicts have had to occur, one linked to fear or insecurity in the territory and the other to marking or territorial delimitation.
It can be the consequence of a sudden and unexpected separation situation.
Example: After the separation or divorce of the parents, the child may feel distressed by the departure of one of them, usually the father.
When there is joint custody, they will spend a few days with the mother and others with the father, this lack of territorial location can produce an emotional conflict for not knowing what their territory (home) is or not knowing who they belong to, if the father or the mother.
In some cases, children may suffer an emotional conflict because they perceive that the father no longer takes care of them or that they cannot count on him as before.
“Dad won’t take care of me anymore!” I feel separated from my father or my mother!”
In other cases, the cause of enuresis is not as a consequence of feeling separated from someone.
But on the contrary, the smell that urine gives off is to try to drive away or to keep the enemy away.
This usually happens in children who have felt groped, abused, etc.
Other times, nocturnal enuresis can be caused by the fear that the child feels towards his parents and, mainly towards his father or towards the figure that fulfills that role (grandfather, teacher, etc.).
It may be a fear of angering him for not obeying his wishes or fear of letting him down, for not being up to par, or not being able to meet their expectations.
It mainly affects children who feel a mixture of fear and rebellion against authority.
During the day they are under strong pressure (school, parents, etc.) and they feel that too much is being demanded of them. In many cases, there are also disagreements between their parents about the method of education that their child should follow.
Children during the day cannot relax or formulate their own pretensions; they cannot free themselves from the pressure they are being subjected to.
“I feel that they invade my territory”
They feel rejected and oppressed because they have imposed a pattern of behavior that prevents them from being who they really are.
“I feel displaced and I am afraid, I seek safety”
In the same way, the arrival of a new member of the family can also cause enuresis in a child.
From this moment on, he feels that he loses the prominence he had with his parents and comes to feel the presence of his brother as a threat of loss of territory.
As a consequence, he unconsciously feels the need to “mark or delimit” what he considers his place, his space.
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