A person with a rigid structure was born into a family that instilled in them a very specific and strict attitude toward behavior.
Their parents probably controlled their entire environment, every circumstance surrounding their child.
Every day, they taught them to “dress well,” maintain perfect hygiene, do their homework properly, behave exquisitely, eat, sleep, get up at the right time, etc.
They tried, by every means, to create a false world around the child, bathed in the illusion of external perfection.
In addition, they also had to control their inner world: their thoughts, their emotions, and their moods.
The strategy consisted of hiding and denying any negative experience that had occurred within the family; for example, the serious illness of a member of the clan, an argument or fight between his parents, or any other setback or personal problem.
Thus, he was made to believe that nothing had happened.
Everything was immediately forgotten, and his attention was directed toward a falsely positive world.
The psychological strategy consisted of denying the bad and focusing on the good, which causes a lack of sensitivity in the child.
If he hears that his father is sick and is shocked by it, but his mother quickly tells him that his father’s health is good, that no such illness exists, that everything is working perfectly, and, furthermore, tries to keep everything in order so that there can be no suspicion about it, he unconsciously comes to the conclusion that he has nothing to worry about.
The rigid structure child thinks: “If my father’s illness doesn’t exist, if it’s not real, if I only imagined it, then the person who was shocked isn’t real either; he’s also a figment of my imagination.”
With this interpretation of events, the child chooses to deny his inner world and begins to suppress his feelings.
This attitude causes him to lose his sensitivity and turns him into a hollow and empty being.
Defensive action against the rejection of love:
To escape love rejection, her attitude will be to avoid engaging in pleasurable and tender sexual contact, for fear of the emotional absence that such contact reminds her of.
To avoid fear, she establishes a separation between loving surrender and the enjoyment of sexual pleasure.
The two cannot coexist; one excludes the other.
For this reason, she chooses to sacrifice her intimacy, avoid loving surrender and commitment.
Furthermore, she chooses to repress her feelings and actions so as not to appear foolish and to avoid being vulnerable, as she is deeply afraid of being hurt.
Furthermore, she is terrified of surrender, because it means having to release all the feelings involved with the rejection again.
Therefore, this emotional block leads them to behave coldly, to become insensitive, frivolous, ambitious, and highly competitive:
They think, “I’m superior; I know everything.”
Having denied their inner reality and governed exclusively by their mind, by their thoughts, they act out of convenience.
They think according to what suits them best; they are not authentic, they are not a person of integrity.
Consequently, they don’t directly seek what they need or want, but instead resort to manipulation.
Extracted from my book The Task of the Soul, if you are interested you can purchase it by clicking on the Amazon link:
